Ok so, a little bit of a confessional. For a time, I fell out of love with my work. Around 2018 and throughout 2019 things became too hectic. The pace was too fast for me to healthily keep up with. Whilst I’m grateful for the opportunities in that time - looking back I exhausted myself. Between that and a harrowing personal struggle I was dealing with, i just didn’t enjoy making art so much. It didn’t free me, it wasn’t the escapism it always was.
You often hear of your passion and hobby loosing it’s sparkle when it becomes your job... that was never the case for me. I was always on cloud nine that I get to do what I love for a living. Just life kind of took its tole on me, and my physical along with mental health suffered. I was working huge jobs and meeting dazzling stars... but when my head hit the pillow at night, I wasn’t happy.
“I come to life when the lights go on, and die with every curtain call.”
I’m very much a glass half full person now, whereas I saw myself becoming more and more pessimistic... Is started to see the glass almost empty, but at the same time I can tell when it was just full of piss. Haha!Then 2020 happened.
The shock of having all my work cancelled and losing all my income hit me so hard. I panicked, as did we all in various ways. I don’t quite know what shifted from March last year but I felt a fire inside me again... I’d get that butterflies in the stomach feeling about new art ideas, that I had lost in recent years. I became so creative. Made work that mattered and had that much more substance... I took time to think, reflect, pause if I needed too... but me being me, got so inspired by the worlds events it became my busiest year to date. I sought professional help for medication to help manage my “low spells” and it’s helped a great deal. I’ve started 2021 with some huge projects and I can’t wait to share them with you all - I’ve got lists and lists of ideas for this year and I feel incredibly positive about what’s to come.
“I’m a new day rising, I’m a brand new sky to hang the stars upon, tonight.”
So that’s my confession... I am indeed in love again... WITH MY ART.Thanks for sticking by me, Nath x